...the greatest photographer ever.
See more of his work here.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Worst Band I Have Seen Lately
Bad bad bad. No no no no no. Fashion before music bad. No. No. No. Bad! No!
Follow this with the overtly emo Little Wolverines and you have quite simply one of the worst opening acts I have seen.
*edit: sorry emos I'm not a 16 year old girl anymore- not diggin it- can't feel it*
Last night Piebald put on an amazing live show.
"These gentlemen know their songs, and that's no accident."
See what I did there? I should be a journalist for Rolling Stone.
Monday, February 26, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Friday, February 23, 2007
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Sunday, February 18, 2007
please check my humor horoscope
What Be Ye Deal?!
There is a new WBYD?! posted as of right now! Check it out!
There is a new WBYD?! posted as of right now! Check it out!
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Downfalls of thinking down below...
I just got it from an interesting ordeal. Had to blog it. I was taking out some trash when I decided to go for a walk (my horoscope said it would help me clear my mind, and I said to myself "shit I'll walk out to Hollywood and get drunk..." for some reason). While walking I got a message from Sarey Martin saying everyone was at Luna Park, so I figured I'd walk. Half hour or so later I'm out in front of Luna Park finishing a cigarette when lo and behold three smoking hot girls come out and ask me to take their picture. No problemo there. They proceed to flirt the living hell out of me, and then their cab rolls up. These chicks ask me if I wanna go with them to Republic for a private party deal, and I'm like "Three hot chicks, club, drinks: this is my lucky day!" So we roll a cab out to Republic, get to the door, they tell the bouncer who they are and he proceeds to let them in and close the rope on me. I'm of course trying to explain how I am actually with those girls, but they were already inside by then. So I start walking...
When I get to Wilshire and La Brea on foot I hailed a cab and paid the fucking 10 bucks for the rest of the trip.
Moral of the story: NEVER think with your dick
Still counts to me as a decent evening though. I mean hey I did get picked up by three stone foxes after all.
Get at me.
-Josh
When I get to Wilshire and La Brea on foot I hailed a cab and paid the fucking 10 bucks for the rest of the trip.
Moral of the story: NEVER think with your dick
Still counts to me as a decent evening though. I mean hey I did get picked up by three stone foxes after all.
Get at me.
-Josh
Friday, February 16, 2007
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Daxflame is one crazy Emo kid
OMG you have to watch this kids video blog... it's soo crazy.. he's insane!
APECHEESE will take you there!
happy valentines day
in honor of being alone, again (every single time since ive been a grown up actually, no i am not bitter) on this lovely hallmark holiday, id like to post some images that i feel make pretty much everyone happy upon the sight of it. i love you all, friendly apecheesers. stay posi.
(OMFG LADYBUG CUPCAKES!!)
(OMFG LADYBUG CUPCAKES!!)
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Menomena - Wet And Rusting
"I made you a present, you’ll never expect it
And when you unravel the secret will travel
It's hard to take risks with a pessimist
I hope that this shaking will help us awaken
Separated by skin ‘til we let ourselves in
It's hard to take risks with a pessimist
It's hard to take risks
I hope one will burn me, I know you’ll desert me
(This is the closest I’ve come to touching you the way I want)
The hope can be painful, I’ll try to be faithful
(It’s hard to take risks) "
this song is great!
get it here
And when you unravel the secret will travel
It's hard to take risks with a pessimist
I hope that this shaking will help us awaken
Separated by skin ‘til we let ourselves in
It's hard to take risks with a pessimist
It's hard to take risks
I hope one will burn me, I know you’ll desert me
(This is the closest I’ve come to touching you the way I want)
The hope can be painful, I’ll try to be faithful
(It’s hard to take risks) "
this song is great!
get it here
My K-Swiss have nukes bitch
It's a fact that I'm ripped with a switch hit stance, flip the switch switch switch
Now we dance through the past with no plans to look back, and we twitch twitch twitch
Got an itch to scratch on the back of the match-book fantasy craft, with a nice new niche
Weapons grade cranium saved uranium, for the swift lift pitch
How much poison must we take in?
Is it a risk?
Am I ever going to be rid of murky distance punching through me with a bronze fist?
get paid and go to hell
No shit here. Just balls. All balls and no dick. How can one fuck with no dick and all balls? Think tea. Drink tea and then tee off. Par 3 me please. Cheese makes some people weak in the knees, but for me it just triggers the colon to work in slow motion. I am an addict to panic. Manic some might say... perhaps frantically poltting each day is not the best course of action. If my plan doesn't work I'll be called a bastard. I cast hard looks and cook up schemes for propelling myself inside of others. Tear seams of others dreams and redefine them with your means. Do you get it? Do you want it? It can be yours, but am I a dumbshit for trading it easily? Breezey outside; making me chilly. Please kiss me. I'd be amiss without it. I doubt many things, and some I will shout about while drunk. At which point placing my ass in a box may be necessary. To the contrary of popular belief, I am not just unique but refreshing. Twist the dagger. Twitch. Watch my swagger with a lisp and quick wit. How I can bullshit a quick paragraph of quips into keys to the door in the floor that leads to Ape Cheese.
Hey Good Buddy!
The Inconvenient Truce.
You think romance exists? Forget about it. I've been up and down every rainbow that ever had a pot of gold attached to it. Sure there's love. I can look into my dogs' eyes every time I feed her and see that. But romance. It's as intangible as the moon is like a slice of salami fitting between your thumb and forefinger. Sure, there are 19 year old women insisting the positive flow of hormones so audacious they'd rob banks given the chance. But connecting with someone, truly truly, I've my doubts. I mean, first there's got to be the attraction. Attraction = the willing to caress with any orifice... any orifice. And then there's got to be the logical reason. The logical reason = this person doesn't bore my to death with their endless banter. Finally, there has to be a soul connection. The soul connection = Jesus, yes no or maybe. Find the equation to all three... god fucking bless... settle for anything less, look forward to a life of irony and or possibly good sex. My only solace is an understanding of a less than positive relationship with my mother. Perhaps If I earn enough I won't have to think about it more. I'll never understand women. But, in retrospect, I've never understood myself. So, I guess we're even.
-J
-J
Monday, February 12, 2007
DIVA'S READY
i love how beyonce isn't even phased that her bandmate totally ate it. lol. stumble and you fall, the show must go on, bitches, where's my closeup.
me so horny
being horny is like being a giant walking erection
lay me or slay me.. either way I'm fucked
lay me or slay me.. either way I'm fucked
Saturday, February 10, 2007
The Perils of the Men's Room
Being a dude and going to the restroom (which is more for pooping than resting, so it should probably be called "The Poop Room" but whatever) can be a dangerous and disgusting enterprise. Now keep in mind not all men's rooms are disgusting plethoras of urine and fecal matter, but let's say it is safe to assume most of them are (this of course is regardless of the quality of their janitorial staff) seething, piss-soaked hellholes. These are common perils one must face in the shitter:
1. The Urinal
Though usually a place of quick piss interaction, the urinal can easily become "decorated" with pubes through some strange pube pulling process that happens somehow to someone. It has always been a mystery to me how this happens, but maybe if you don't shave your junk it makes this phenomenon more common. Also keep your eyes peeled to the walls around urinals. You may be drunk and think it nice to lean against whilst taking a piss, but low there may in fact be boogers smeared there. You can turn your back on a lot of things, but NEVER
turn your back on a men's washroom.
2. The Stall
Quirky decorations and clever graffittied lymerics are usually adorned to these fine structures, but you may find the occasional gum, blood, snot (in it's various forms) , and even semen upon their surfaces. Be wary of coming in even remote contact with these. Wash up after touching the handle.
3. The Toilet
Inside the stall's protective shell lies the toilet itself. Is it a motion flush sensor? If it is, do NOT
lean to far forward trying to plop out a brownie or it will flush and spray you with cold water on your anus. If this is not the case with your particular toilet situation then no worries. There are generally three thiungs to look out for / consider when thinking of using a public toilet like this.
a.) Seat Covers - these are not there to protect your from disease (which your butt will not catch from a toilet seat) so much as they are simply there so you don't have to sit in someone's pee and the occasionaly waxy buttwipe when the stall is out of TP. Make use of these.
b.) Toilet Paper - Is there enough? Did you check the roll before sitting down? Are you going to need to change stalls or grab paper from an adjacent one? These are things you must know FOR CERTAIN before claiming your "throne".
c.) Seat Condition - The worst thing that can happen is you finally pick a stall, use a little toilet paper to give the seat the once over, and then sit down only to feel the warmth of the buttocks (and possibly the balls) of some sweaty old man who took a 2 hour shit on that seat before you got there. Also check for urine stains, semen, pubicals, and/or feces. You never know.
Good luck to you, and remember:
Taking a shit at work is like getting paid to take a shit, so save your shits for work.
Your Friend,
Josh
Josh
I am deadly fucking serious people...
DEADLY! I have made pancakes from the following recipe three times in the past week now and I seriously believe that they have the capability of changing your life. Don't short change yourself, fucking go out and get the ingredients and make this recipe (adding blueberries doesn't hurt either) YOUARE FUCKING BLOWING IT IF YOU DON"T!!!11 BEST PANCAKES EVER!@@!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)